If I could make a wish it would be to help the compassionate nurses who work their fingers to the bone and care when all the other members of the team have left the bedside, who go above and beyond their scope of practice on a daily basis, the gift of caring at that higher level for themselves… But we nurses are notoriously bad at looking after ourselves aren’t? I was but that led me to burnout, depression and a miserable and painful 10 years of my lifeIf you could make a wish and give yourself a skill that would help you continue to be the brilliant nurse you already are, what would it be?
You see I’m having a lot of nurses coming to me on this facebook page, asking for me to help them, and being a nurse I love to help! Some of the issues you are asking about are directly related to work and studying, while others are of a more personal nature, but ultimately they all affect YOU: your sense of wellbeing, your physical and mental health and your peace of mind. Now I know we as a collective group are not particularly used to thinking about our needs let alone admitting we need some help, ( well i was like that) and we know that we tend to be pretty bad at looking after ourselves, smoking, eating the wrong foods on nights, endless cups of treacle , sorry I mean strong coffee ;), and poor sleep patterns. And we tend to put our needs at the bottom of the list, to our partners, patients, kids, the postman and that little old lady in the supermarket! As nurses we care for others, but we must care for ourselves to enable us to be the best kick ass nurses we can be. I know because I didn’t do this until I’d burn out, too late, I was a mess and goneski. Yet I’ve always been a nurse, will always be a nurse in my heart and now have the passion to help you all to avoid my pain. And trust me it was incredibly painful and has been a long road to recovery…
I remember saying to my mum, I give so much and care so whole heartedly for my patients and yet I don’t feel the system cares for us at all. My team does, well some of them, but the health system is designed to work you into the ground.
And yet as the Dalai Lama says, if you speak badly of yourself but speak nicely to others then you’re a hypocrit. You have to have self love before you can genuinely love and care for others.
So I would love to ask you if you could improve or resolve one thing in your working or personal life that would directly affect your ability to nurse even better what would it be?
Do you need help with resilience and coping with the emotional side of nursing?
Do you struggle with switching your emotional state from one patient to another without taking all the baggage along with you?
Could you use some practical skills of what to do if you were faced with aggressive patients or heaven forbid a colleague 😉
And students, what situations would you want to be better prepared for that uni is not currently covering?
Do you find you take on other peoples pain?
Does what you deal with at work affect your personal relationships?
Do you have mobility problems due to nursing?
Are you tired a lot or let’s face it all the time?
Does the work interfere with your sleep patterns, one word, nights ..hello!!!
If you were the senior nurse on the shift and a colleague said she was being bullied, would you know what to do. Would you do anything? Time and again we see nurses eat their own and their young. How can a professional move onward let alone upward and forward if that behaviour is entrenched in our behaviour?
Do you have depression, anger management problems, or anxiety?
I will seek out the best people in the world to help you (and we have interviewed 1000’s of them over the time of writing these books so they should answer my phone call!!) Be they nurses in the top of their profession, but only ones who haven’t lost their heart to the patient connection 😉
or self defence gurus, Dr’s of psychology who have practical experience in coping with stressful situations or world class physios who can give posture exercise for everyday living and lifting – Pilates or yoga on the internet, brilliant! Even a Buddhist who can help with breath and the power of now…. Whatever you need, shout out and I will get back to you. It may take a while as these things do but please let me know what you need and I’ll explore options to help you be the best nurse you can be but even more importantly be the healthiest, happiest and peaceful person… I guess I should clarify I can’t be a miracle worker and go back in time, do your assignments for you or find you that special person!! But I’m open to any suggestions…..So nurses, stop, have a cuppa and have a think about what YOU need, go on give it a try…
Please email me at allie:whatiwihsiknew.com so the big world of facebook won’t know what’s on your mind and I can respond to you personally, one on one and in complete confidence.